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If Only

Were it only that we had never met
And shared a moment of laughter
If only we had not taken the time
Getting to know each other
Hours into days, into weeks, into months
Sharing our time and our lives
Talking about everything
Sparing nothing
Our hopes our dreams
And even the pain
Of what we were needing and wanting
Kindred spirits with twisted humor
Searching for our places in
Life’s grand scheme
You spoke of friendship
And a bond to strong to be broken
I saw in you a man of massive character
Unrivaled in any I had ever met
If only you could have truly been
The person you proclaimed yourself to be
But you weren’t
And you aren’t
And its possible you may never be
If only it had not been so easy for me to trust and believe in you
But I did
If only it had not been so easy for you to shatter that trust
But it was
And you did

Losing You

Am I losing you?
It’s a question I am forced to ask
There seems to be a difference in the way you are with me
I try to blame it on circumstance
But it gets more difficult everyday
It is said that things are lost not all at once
But over time
Like the wearing away of a stone or a mountainside
Has that begun for us?
Will we find less and less time for togetherness?
Until nothing is left but the bittersweet memory
Of what once was
And the promise of what might have been
Why am I already mourning the loss of you?
When you haven’t said goodbye yet
Soon will I awaken to find my pillow wet with tears?
But be unable to understand or remember why.
Am I destined to become for you
Just a moment in time that fades softly away
Like an autumn sunset

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